Here is another thing I have been struggling with, and I’ve struggled with it long before I became a wife. Social media!
I have come to the conclusion that I spend more time looking at a phone screen and tapping my way through Facebook and Instagram than I do focusing on my marriage. I have been convicted lately about how much attention and time I give to social media.
I’m disheartened by how much of my confidence comes from how much affirmation I get from responses to a photo or status update. Even more so, how much I compare my life to other people’s online. I find myself looking at their photos and posts and wishing I had their life. Social media breeds anxiety, especially in us ladies – wives, mom’s, or singles ready to mingle.
It’s funny because if you had the ability to look to the left or right of that friend’s “perfect life” Instagram post, we would probably see a mess of things. In other words, their reality probably isn’t far from our own reality.
Social media allows us to show pieces of our lives, and only the ones we choose to show, which are often just moments of triumph or joy. Posting those moments is not a bad thing, however the trouble begins when we start perceiving these as reality and not simply a beautiful moment in time.
Too many times I stumble into wanting something in that person’s life. Whether it is their financial wealth, cute clothes, a husband who intentionally thinks about cooking dinner or bringing home flowers…whatever it is, I somehow find myself comparing.
I read a passage from Colossians the other day, which really put my addiction to social media into perspective. “Set your minds on things that are above, not on things that are on earth. (5) Put to death therefore what is earthly in you: sexual immorality, impurity, passion, evil desire, and covetousness, which is idolatry.” Colossians 3: 2 & 5. This particular passage shows me that God is giving us instructions on how to live, and how to prioritize.
You can walk into any restaurant or store and see an entire family or just the parents glued to their phones, not having a conversation with each other but caring more about what happened in other’s lives while they were at work or on the drive over to the restaurant. Knowing that Joe and I are bringing a child into this world, I would really like to stray from this way of living and focus more on each other and our friendships. Asking each other questions like, “how was your day?” “Is there anything you are struggling with?”
Social media isn’t all bad. I do believe it can keep us connected to people we love. It becomes bad, when it becomes a source of false security or imbalance in our lives. It’s easy to find validation in things that steal our attention, social media is just one of those things. It’s my prayer that I would give Christ all the power for defining me, giving me worth, and giving me purpose. My prayer for others who struggle with this, is that you turn and look at your significant other, and question whether or not you are doing everything to the best of your ability to grow with them. Do you know everything about them and are you focusing your time and energy on getting to know them. It should be a priority in your lives.
Have a blessed day!